April 7, 2011

Product Testing, part 2

Sorry to the men who read this nonsense, but this might be a little much for you.

I'm giving you the warning now. This is girly stuff...detailed, graphic [OK, maybe not so graphic], but definitely detailed girly stuff. Use your imagination, you're probably right, that's what I'm talking about. I'll always use a page break so you'll be properly warned because there will still be other fun stuff happening up in this joint too. 

( :

That was your warning.

Don't click the link below.

Welcome women.

Did you read Part 1?

Taco vs. Torpedo

Yup, that's what I'm calling these babies. By "babies" I mean, the insertion process for my DivaCup. They have two possible recommendations. I'm sure there are more, but my mind is already blown by this whole process, so I am currently unable to think of any unique techniques for inserting my DivaCup. 

Fold Option 1: The Taco
Here's the deal, my virginal va-jay-jay hasn't had a lot of action. [If you're still caught up in the concept of "virginal va-jay-jay" please see this post. Twenty-eight-year-old virgins still exist. Perhaps I'll 
elaborate upon this someday.] The Taco, has a rather large radius in terms of insertion. 

I tried it. It was uncomfortably unsuccessful. 
Moving onward! And upward! *snicker*

Fold Option 2: The Torpedo
Much better. This fold is a little more complicated, but overall much much easier on my lady-parts. The last picture is representative of it unfolded in your body, but we all know our vaginal canal and uterus are not straight up and down, so ignore my improper angles. 

So I did it! I folded the torpedo, stuck in inside of me, didn't feel it, removed it, washed it and put that baby back in! I'm only in hour seven, but I think I might be sold. 

Things I've noticed:
  • It's time to get intimate with yourself...or myself.  
  • I am one of those people (Yes, Lee, it's true) who refused to use a tampon without an applicator. Not because I was opposed to those naked tampons, but because they hurt. Shoving dry cotton up there? No, gracias. 
  • This is what it's like: make the torpedo, stick the DivaCup in working it further into the vaginal canal until the stem is just inside the base of the vagina, run your finger around the edge of the "bowl" of the DivaCup to make sure that it's not folded. 
  • One time it kinda made a popping sound. You know, like when you take your lips and pop them. 
  • That last statement was not meant to sound dirty.
  • When I removed the DivaCup, I grabbed it just above the stem. I can't actually grip the stem because I have ZERO fingernails [good for massage, bad for just about everything else], so I pinched and pulled. I actually engaged my pelvic floor muscles and pushed it out. 
  • Can everyone feel their pelvic floor muscles? 
  • I hope so. 
  • Otherwise I am super-strong. In my vagina. Which is weird. 
  • So, when I went to put it back in, I had to give myself a few minutes to just let everything relax. My first 24 hours of my period I'm usually very crampy, so I have to consciously relax. 
  • Then I rewarded myself by eating two Nutella cookies--they only have 4 ingredients!

Who's uncomfortable? 

Any questions? 
ooh-oooooh! I have a question: am I going to have any problems in the water? water skiing? 

I'm so excited that so many of you use the DivaCup already! So what are the other products, hints, tips you have for us? I'm doing a series for women, but I only know what I know...mostly my plan thus far is to talk about things for large breasted women (sports bras, regular bras, swimsuits). I know you're not all large breasted, so that could get boring. 
Any other ideas? 


  1. Well I haven't gotten up to the Diva Cup, but I have been using my Instead Cups for several years now and I love them!!! UP side, they are very flexible and are more like a diaphragm than a tubed cup but on the down side they are disposable, but still better for me than tampons. They weren't as scary to me as the Diva, but maybe someday :)

  2. @Becky---once I get it figured out, I'll let you know. I don't even know where you get Instead Cups! Why haven't we had this conversation? I feel like there have been several points in my life when I should have asked you for a tampon. It's just my way. ( :