struggle

I started classes last week. I was signed up for 9 hours and waitlisted for 3 hours. Ugh. What a pain to be on a waitlist. So, I went through this whole rigamarole to get into the class. FINALLY, I was signed up. 12 credit hours.

During the rigamarole, I met with my advisor. I learned that I needed to take a statistics class [yeah, 3 more credit hours = 15 credit hours] and that I hadn't applied to the accerated nursing program yet. So, when I thought I'd applied last fall what did I do? No clue. Of course, the other side is I'm not even allowed to apply for the program until I've either take or am currently enrolled in all the prereqisite coursework.

Hence the 15 hour course-load this semester: Physiology [approximately 120 students]. Microbiology [approximately 150 students]. Human Development [approximately 120 students]. Statistics [approximately 35 students]. I've never sat in classes that have so many students. It's cray-cray for this small, liberal-arts college loving girl. The only class I talk in is statistics. My labs have people sitting in who don't even have desks. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS. Yes I do: there are more students than desks. If you're new around here I don't want you to think I'm a complete idiot.

So, the earliest I can start the nursing program is Fall 2013. If I get in...which I won't find out until June. Yeah, that makes me nervous.

On a more positive note, I am excited for a summer! YAY!! I love summer. Now, what to do with my summer time? I don't know, but I'll figure it out. Something that includes working and making money I think.

So that's, that. My life in a nut-shell. I pack my lunch. I study in the library. I'm going to talk to someone in one of my classes someday.

Maybe.
I'm shy.

This transition has been a struggle. It seemed like nothing could go right. Moving was hard. I didn't say the goodbyes I wanted to. I was waitlisted. I had to do this paperwork. I had to do that paperwork. I needed this class. I didn't do that correctly. Parking was confusing. AND I still miss Hank.

I feel called to midwifery and since God was in that calling I had the [incorrect] assumption that that would somehow make it easier.

Why would I think that?

I think I may have been drunk. Except I don't drink, so probably not. (-:

In the midst of the struggle, I catch glimpses of the beauty around me. Encouraging texts from friends. An advisor who always smiles [although, I'm probably driving her crazy] and asks me about my weekend. Family that welcomes me into their lives. Sweet messages on facebook.

I'm really working to remember to focus on my goal. Since, I love a good visual reminder, I made this one to print out and put up in my room:

If you want .jpg copy of this 4x6, shoot me an email or you can grab it off google docs. 

love you people.

amy