February 12, 2012

My New Thing

When I went to massage school I began having to cut my nails really short.

I mean, REEEEEAALLLY short. Like down as far as I could get the clippers and then filed back so that it was smooth and not a sharp cut. 

Slightly strange, but if you've ever had a massage from a long-nailed therapist and felt the daggers in your muscles you'd appreciate my attention to detail and short nails. (-:

You may also know that I have inherited gargantuan hands. As a matter of fact one of the very few episodes of Seinfeld I've watched was the Man Hands episode [Just so you know, I hate Seinfeld. I also hate Dave Matthews Band and beer, but I tend to enjoy the presence of people who like these things.] and ever since I saw that episode I deemed that I, Amy Elizabeth, have MAN HANDS. 

This means I spent years and years not drawing attention to my hands. I wore a ring for about 30 seconds. I rarely painted my nails. No bracelets. No nothing. Plain and basic was my style of choice to keep attention away from my hands.

Except now, I don't care. My hands are still huge. I can only pray that I will be sent a future husband with hands larger than mine. 

And I paint my nails. 
Eh-vurh-ree week. 

It might be safe to say that I need to stop purchasing nail polish. 

Over the past four years or so, I owned this many nail polishes:
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Since November I have accumulated these: 
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I doubled my collection.

These are the kind that have a fine tipped brush. I got them for $1 at Dollah Tree...price check on aisle 5? Price check? 
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These are my latest aquisitions: 
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They're the mini-OPI Nicki Minaj collection. So.Much.Fun.

I only own OPI polishes because I can get them at a discount with my massage license. I don't get any other perks, so I go with nail polish and hair products at the salon supply store. [They don't carry ANY massage stuff.]

Back to nails. These are my Valentine nails:
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Right hand.
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Left Hand. 

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a)They're not perfect.
b)This took me over an hour during the superbowl.
c)Painting your right hand is hard.
d)Yes, I am anal retentive and slightly ridiculous.
e)I like it!

The cheese of Valentine's Day suckers me in every time. I love hearts and pink and red and all the glitz and crap, especially if it's homemade crap. My nails represent some homemade crap. (-:

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