it started two years ago

This week timehop informed me that I posted these pictures two years ago:

I had just gotten back from a weekend at the lake and I had a chemistry class that night because I was CERTAIN I wasn't getting into IUPUI, so I was taking a pre-requisite course for another program. I opened my packet and burst into tears.

The tears were happy tears.

I don't think I even realized how much I had hoped to get into this program at the time. I'm sure I wasn't on the first list of students to get in because my GPA wasn't exactly stellar [not that it was terrible, BUT definitely not at the top of the food chain], but I got in and started in August 2013.

As an accelerated program, we had five semesters over the course of 20 months to our BSN. Between studying on campus by 4:30am after a 12-hour shift to endless hours writing care plans, most days I’m just glad I made it through. I wasn’t the best student…I finished solidly in the middle of the pack [I know this because our capstone selection was based on grades]. It doesn’t really matter to me - ask me again if I apply for grad school and I have to justify some of those Bs - at this point I KNOW THINGS.

I may not be the greatest test-taker in the world, but I can assess the crap out of a patient. I pay attention to details. I can multi-task and juggle things about as well as any new nurse should, those skills take time and I’ll get better. I can anticipate and think outside of the box and question orders…sometimes. I’ll get better. I can contribute to the team to provide good patient care. My point is that I’m going to be the kind of nurse I would want taking care of my loved ones because I won’t stop until I’m busy kickin’ ass and takin’ names. Can't stop won't stop.

Last Monday I took my boards, the NCLEX, and it was terrible, horrible, no good, very bad. I hadn’t told anyone my test date, but due to several unforeseen changes, I had to borrow a car and “why?” was asked. Uh…well, it’s my exam day? Needless to say, everyone in the family knew and I definitely didn't want to talk about it. At. All.

Immediately following the exam, I began checking the site for quick results. It says up to 48-hours, but surely they’ll know before then, right? How long can it take to grade a computer test?
11:00am: nothing.
11:32am: nothing.
11:57am: nothing.
12:11pm: nothing.
-break-
2:09pm: nothing.
-distraction from the niece-
3:48pm: nothing.
4:09pm: nothing.
5:21pm: nothing.
-dinner-
6:43pm: nothing.
7:17pm: nothing.
8:33pm: nothing.
10:24pm: nothing.

GO TO BED, AMY.

I woke up and pulled out my computer Tuesday morning.

I’m done. I’m an RN. I’m a BSN.




I need a job, yo.