June 6, 2015

it started two years ago

This week timehop informed me that I posted these pictures two years ago:
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I had just gotten back from a weekend at the lake and I had a chemistry class that night because I was CERTAIN I wasn't getting into IUPUI, so I was taking a pre-requisite course for another program. I opened my packet and burst into tears.

The tears were happy tears.

I don't think I even realized how much I had hoped to get into this program at the time. I'm sure I wasn't on the first list of students to get in because my GPA wasn't exactly stellar [not that it was terrible, BUT definitely not at the top of the food chain], but I got in and started in August 2013.

As an accelerated program, we had five semesters over the course of 20 months to our BSN. Between studying on campus by 4:30am after a 12-hour shift to endless hours writing care plans, most days I’m just glad I made it through. I wasn’t the best student…I finished solidly in the middle of the pack [I know this because our capstone selection was based on grades]. It doesn’t really matter to me - ask me again if I apply for grad school and I have to justify some of those Bs - at this point I KNOW THINGS.

I may not be the greatest test-taker in the world, but I can assess the crap out of a patient. I pay attention to details. I can multi-task and juggle things about as well as any new nurse should, those skills take time and I’ll get better. I can anticipate and think outside of the box and question orders…sometimes. I’ll get better. I can contribute to the team to provide good patient care. My point is that I’m going to be the kind of nurse I would want taking care of my loved ones because I won’t stop until I’m busy kickin’ ass and takin’ names. Can't stop won't stop.

Last Monday I took my boards, the NCLEX, and it was terrible, horrible, no good, very bad. I hadn’t told anyone my test date, but due to several unforeseen changes, I had to borrow a car and “why?” was asked. Uh…well, it’s my exam day? Needless to say, everyone in the family knew and I definitely didn't want to talk about it. At. All.

Immediately following the exam, I began checking the site for quick results. It says up to 48-hours, but surely they’ll know before then, right? How long can it take to grade a computer test?
11:00am: nothing.
11:32am: nothing.
11:57am: nothing.
12:11pm: nothing.
-break-
2:09pm: nothing.
-distraction from the niece-
3:48pm: nothing.
4:09pm: nothing.
5:21pm: nothing.
-dinner-
6:43pm: nothing.
7:17pm: nothing.
8:33pm: nothing.
10:24pm: nothing.

GO TO BED, AMY.

I woke up and pulled out my computer Tuesday morning.
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I’m done. I’m an RN. I’m a BSN.




I need a job, yo.


2 comments :

  1. You are amazing and wonderful and brilliant and I'm very proud of you and mostly super thankful that I can come to you with all my random health related questions over brunch.

    "Hey Amy I have a weird rash on my shoulder should I see a doctor?"
    "Hey Amy do I really need these tests my doctor wants me to get?"
    "Hey Amy I passed out last weekend and ended up laying on the bathroom floor for an hour because I was too dizzy to crawl to the couch—that's no big deal right?"
    "Hey Amy my doctor gave me all this info over the phone and I'm super overwhelmed can you log in to my account and tell me what my test results mean?"

    ReplyDelete