July 22, 2013

hey there, Sweet Thing

When I sit down for brunch the first thing I want is a menu, the second thing is COFFEEEEEEEEEE. I have morning needs. I drink my coffee with about half [ish, it's not like I'm anal rententive enough to actually measure] a Sweet'N Low.
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Some people just call these pink sugars.
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A generic version of the pink sugar is called Sweet Thing.

I love that name, I think the real version should be Sweet Thing. Sweet Thing vs Sweet'N Low? No contest. It makes me smile just thinking about it. I want the endearment "Sweet Thing" to occur more often in my life. I don't mean it in any kind of derogatory, smarmy, lecherous way, but just like people use terms of endearment in the South, "what can I do for you Sweet Thing/shug/hon?"
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Back when MegB and EmmyT were visiting, we went out for brunch. Our server was adorable. As three single ladies around thirty, we play this game I will call "How Old Do You Think He Is?" whenever we are out and about.

I'm terrible at it most of the time. "Oh hey, illegally young boy, you're cute." "Hi there, man who could be my father, I like your face."
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We decided our server was 18 or 19-years-old. So we flirted with him. HARMLESSLY. Because we're 30. [He was 19, we asked.]
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MegB gave him the pick-up line, "Oh, you dropped your nametag" and handed him the Sweet Thing.

He blushes and giggles a little like he doesn't know how to respond and heads to the back of the restaurant where the other servers are gathered. We worried we'd creeped him out. We watched him tell his co-workers about this table of ladies trying to pick him up and gesture to our booth.

They think we're hilarious! WE ARE!

He walks back with our checks and says, "Here you go, Honey."
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BOOM. Well played sir, well played, good luck at college.

July 20, 2013

the baby fever

I have two college friends who are expecting in the next 6 months. I have five [FIVE!] friends from my small group who have had babies in the past 9 months. I have a niece who was born in January.
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My loins yearn for the babies.

It seems preemptive to think about motherhood without a partner in crime life.

Oh, being single. I love and loathe you all at the same time.

I'm in a love phase right now.

Mostly because I can barely keep my own life straight and I can't imagine trying to fit getting to know someone else and keeping his life straight too. Sheesh.
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Of course some of you are thinking, "For the right person....blah blah blah." Yes, for the right person I'm sure time would magically appear. He'd also fart rainbows and butterflies. *fingers crossed* True life confession: if you tell me you have someone you want me to meet I will internet stalk him. I have no shame. The conclusion you can draw from this is that I'm basically nuts, because what kind of sense does that make? I just said that I like being single, but if you mention "oh, I want you to meet _______," I'm instantly online trying to figure out who this person is, what he looks like, and his profession. Cray-cray=me.

Needless to say, my baby fever is gone. Zero. Zilch. Nada. Unless I squeeze a baby, then my uterus is like, "Hey, what's up, amy?" and I'm like, "No, uterus, no. Go back to bed."

So, my uterus is in semi-forced hibernation. I'll let you know when she's ready to come back out to torment me.
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BTW: we're having a debate [i.e. my SIL and I are having a competition], what do you call the thing I'm doing behind The Niece's ear? I'm fluttering my lips and blowing air making a sounds like "pfffffffft." She thinks it's hilarious. 

July 18, 2013

today I drove a Massey Furguson

I'm in Kansas for a few weeks. If you're here, holla at me! I've got a few things on my schedule, but there's always time for friends. (-:

I grew up on a farm. I've told you all about it, but I haven't done anything on the farm--work-wise--in, oh, about 12 years. So, you know, that's the lifetime of a 7th grader.
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Today I broke my hiatus by spending four and a half hours discing a field.
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It was a gorgeous summer day in Kansas!
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I tried to make sure that I maintained my good looks while working. I don't make the duck lips on purpose, so don't judge.
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Now, the real question...does everything look better though a filter? Because I fell out of the tractor [I have a very graceful way of dismounting] and the backside of my left arm looks like this:
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That's going to leave a mark.

July 8, 2013

Real Life Confession

I am a bit of a nomad right now. In the start of the summer, I was job searching for something I could do during the week while I was in Indianapolis and then I was going to do massage on the weekends in Fort Wayne.

Then when I got into school, I was like, "Screw this job crap. My job is being a student." And I had graduation and family reunion two weekends in a row and then my parents were up here and then I worked for a weekend.

The real thing that happened was that I haven't been back to Indy like I had planned. That means that I've been living out of my laundry basket.

What I'm telling you is this: I somehow ended up with three sports bras and one regular bra for the last month.

This is an improper ratio.

July 5, 2013

I'm Lazy

I'm not really lazy, just a little bit lazy. (-: The 900 pictures I mentioned before? I'm just not in the mood to edit and write about each event, so I've conveniently summed them up in eight photos. Including a couple of photo collages [it's a 2-for-1 deal?].

OK, these aren't all the events because there are still several on my camera and well, it's upstairs and I'm downstairs and....yeah.

Things That Happened Recently:

Katie-boo graduated and had a pinterest worthy party.
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We're cousins. Some might say we look related. (-:

Janiece got baptized at the lake. Public declaration of loving and following Jesus for the win!!
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I witnessed my first birth and it was AAAAAAAHHHHHH-MAY-ZZZZZZING!!! Freals. I just sang that like an opera rockstar. Let me just tell you that the real rockstar was this baby's mama. She birthed like a champion. [Does that even make sense? I was in awe of her calmness and how she handled the entire process, is what I'm trying to say.]
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We had a family reunion.
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There were three Hoffman babies born in three separate states within 5 weeks of each other. Procreation.

These two were present so I hugged and kissed them like crazy.
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The nephew thinks he's some kind of grown-up kid who's too busy playing for hugs and kisses. What the what?! You're two, kid. Get over here and give me some love.


that is all.